Sometimes when I am asleep, and the wind is coming in through the window of my childhood bedroom, I can almost feel you here. For a sleepover, the way we used to do all the time. It was just our clothes then, I didn’t know what was mine or yours. It was our day then, we never left each other’s sides. It was our life then, a pact that if we made it to 40 and were still single, we’d run away together and live on the beach in Mexico. I always wake up in a sweat from those dreams now. Now I live in your phone as an unknown cell number, I live in your photos as a girl you used to know. I live in that stain I left on the carpet of your truck when my bubblegum ice cream melted. Now I’m the most hated girl. For twenty-five years in a row. If you’ve never been the last choice friend, undiagnosed depression at a very young age, artsy but filled with melancholy girl, then you’ve never been the most hated girl. But I’ve worn her skin all my life. At first it was the separate group chat with 9 memb...
Correction *they laughed. Are we getting too close on this blog? Am I getting too comfortable? Maybe. But I’m gonna talk about getting embarrassed. Can anyone guess what song I was singing? It’s a banger!!!! But the moment I looked over into the Kia Soul beside me and saw a my-aged boy laughing at me, I felt my soul leave my body. Cheeks: red Fight or flight: activated Music: paused Ready to: die And the light turned green, he went down a different road, and that was the end of it. That was literally the end of it. And here’s where I had my breakthrough (early in the story! I know!) Being embarrassed is stupid you guys. It’s literally the stupidest thing. I have lived in this city (a massive one at that) a whole 4 weeks. And I’m really about to be embarrassed by some guy sitting next to me in traffic that I’ll never see again? Yeah right. Think about a time you saw someone do something stupid. Like their foot catches the sidewalk and...